Scrapbook
by tsusami
Summary: A collection of Naruto x Gaara one-shots. Ratings and genres posted in the titles. Rated T for some of the more mature stories.
1. How Much Happens, G, AngstComfort

How Much Happens

How Much Happens

--

_How much happens in a day_

_When our life dries up, _

_Only the roots remain to us, _

_And the wind is cold like hate._

_Then let us change our skins, _

_Our nails, our blood, our gazing;_

_And you kiss me and I go out_

_To sell light on the roads._

Pablo Neruda

--

For a moment, Naruto felt as though he were looking at himself; the Kazekage looked so small sitting on the children's swing that hung so low in the branches. For a moment, he saw not the regal man in front of him, but a small blond child sitting dejectedly upon the silent swing in the shadow of smiling children grasping their parent's warm hands.

There were no children here now, but there would be soon and he felt a thrill of panic at being alone- felt fear for the man sitting on the swing and wanted to shield him from the same.

"Uzumaki," Gaara's calm voice broke through his imagining. "What's wrong?"

Naruto slipped into his mask, shaking his head and giving the Kazekage what he hoped was a reassuring smile. He tried to stave off his memories, as unwilling to lose to the loneliness now as he was back then.

"You look silly in that swing," he forced a laugh. "Sure you don't want to sit somewhere else?" He heard his discomfort slip out in those lost few words- could feel them falling from his mouth like leaves.

The Kazekage was quiet in response. Naruto avoided his gaze, hoping to escape scrutiny. He had never told Gaara about his spot by the swings. He had never told him anything about his childhood, or how suffocating the pain could seem when the memories snuck up on him. He had told himself so many times that he wouldn't cry over it- that he wouldn't let himself lose to the past.

A small stream of sand brushed his face. He batted at it, but it persistently rubbed against him like a willful cat until forcing him to face the man sitting calmly behind him.

"Uzumaki," Gaara tilted his head and Naruto knew by his expression that he was pondering something. "There's nothing to fear."

Naruto felt his mask slipping. Having been discovered, he let his anxiety show.

A swirl of sand brushed the back of his palm. "I can protect you."

Naruto tensed. A million thoughts swirled through his head as he tried to wrap his brain around his friend's earnest declaration. He had panicked at first, wondering how his friend had become so adept at reading people- at reading _him_. But as he thought on it, he realized that perhaps that's not what he had meant at all; that perhaps he had misinterpreted his anxiety as being over the safety of their location and their vulnerability against potential attackers.

Naruto smirked. "You? Protect me? I thought _I _was the guard," he joked. "Besides, we're meeting a group of five year olds. How dangerous could they be?"

Gaara's expression didn't change. His brow furrowed and his green eyes narrowed.

"Uzumaki, come here." Naruto heard the command behind those words. He hesitated a moment before closing in the space between them. Once there, he flinched under the considerate gaze of the green eyes looking up at him. Gaara was watching him carefully and then, to his surprise, he took his hand.

"Relax. I'm here." And Naruto knew then that Gaara had not misunderstood. Even without him saying anything, he _knew_.

His first reaction was to deny it, but looking at his dearest friend's concerned face, Naruto couldn't help smiling a little. The hand holding his was strong and it felt warm and solid against his own. He looked at it as though seeing it for the first time and felt the bubbling of what he could only classify as grateful.

For a moment, he almost teared up; for a moment, he felt like it was okay to lose to those memories and to his loneliness and to admit his sadness. For a moment, it was okay, because the man in front of him had nearly said it was and the man in front of him wouldn't let it happen again.

Naruto adjusted his grip to hold onto that hand a little tighter. Gaara was with him now. And like that, they would wait for the children to arrive- together; their clasped hands would chase the demons away.

--


	2. Shady Ramen, PG, Humor

Even before he sat down, Kakashi could smell how bad the ramen was

--

Shady Ramen

--

Even before he sat down, Kakashi could smell how bad the ramen was. The smells drifting over from behind the counter did nothing to whet his appetite. Indeed, it made him want to run the other way. Suna was not famed for their ramen. The flour and pork were hard to come by. But this place was suggested by their Kazekage, no doubt for Naruto's sake, and as a guest, Kakashi was obligated to come along.

The one merit to the small stand was that it did provide a canopy of shade. It was not yet noon and already Kakashi could feel the soon to be harsh midday heat. He immediately felt relief upon entering the stand and seating himself at one of the stools. Naruto chatted excitedly about having ramen, but Kakashi knew by the pinched tone of his voice and the twitch in his smile that he was not looking forward to the meal anymore than he was. But Naruto knew how to recognize a kind gesture when he saw one. He would not turn down the Kazekage's kindness.

The two young men sat down and poured over the menu. Kakashi was content to sit back and try to find the only non ramen items available. He was relieved to find fried rice as an option. Naruto meanwhile poured over the menu with an uncharacteristic thoroughness. At Ichiraku he would shout out his order before his bottom hit the seat. Here he checked each name, the ingredients and even seemed to consider the price. Gaara was just as patient.

Kakashi marveled at Naruto's lack of honesty in this situation and pondered what made Naruto so different towards Gaara than any of the others. Not famed for his social sensitivity at times, Sakura could attest to the numerous incidents a few inconsiderate or brash, honest remarks earned him a punch in the face. But with Gaara, Naruto was all caution and attentiveness. He wondered if perhaps Naruto thought him special. Special in the sense that Gaara was sensitive in ways that others were not. But Kakashi was certain that Gaara was the only one who could get Naruto to sit down and eat bad ramen.

"Have you decided yet?" an older man asked them. He wiped his hands on his white apron, looking from face to face expectantly.

"I'll take a side of rice and dumplings," Kakashi smiled. "Too hot for ramen just now." The man nodded and looked at Naruto and Gaara. Naruto looked up and put on his winning smile.

"Two shiro ramen!" he exclaimed with less than heartfelt excitement. Kakashi chuckled because he knew Naruto never ate shiro ramen. His favorite was miso. But from the smell of things, the usual soup bases were less than savory and shiro was the hardest one to mess up. Kakashi was right. Naruto didn't trust the ramen at this joint.

Their cook began putting things on the stove and throwing stuff in pans as Kakashi watched carefully to make sure he wasn't getting poisoned. There were few people on the streets, mostly running errands or doing shopping and a few that waved to the Kazekage along the way. But mostly the streets were quiet and only Naruto's chatter filled the silence. The Kazekage smiled in amusement as Naruto regaled him with tales from his missions or the usual mishaps back home. He seemed entertained by the tales or perhaps the telling of them. Naruto was all gestures and facial expressions, his pitch and tone a mini rollercoaster in his narration.

Kakashi wondered if Naruto treated Gaara differently because he was the only one willing to sit through Naruto's tales quietly. Kakashi would take off as soon as he was able and Sakura would frequently interrupt him to point out the exaggerations or illogical conclusions. Sasuke would ignore Naruto altogether. But here, Naruto had a captivated audience, even if it only consisted of one.

His rice and pan fried dumplings were served first. They looked fine from what he could tell and so he quietly apologized for eating first and, with two boys caught up in their own stories, Kakashi ate in peace. The dumplings weren't bad, but he drowned them in vinegar and sauce anyways. The rice was a little greasy, but he liked it that way. He imagined they both had to be better than the ramen.

By the time the ramen was served Kakashi was already finished eating. Naruto grumped about failing to see Kakashi without his mask, again, but then quickly went about adding everything he could to his bowl. He showed Gaara how to add the oils and sesame seeds and spices as well. When he was ready, he took a deep breath and then took up his first mouthful of noodles.

Kakashi watched him carefully. He was eating quickly, but that could be because he didn't like the taste. You can't taste what you swallow whole. And when there was no great exhalation and sounds of content, Kakashi tried not to chuckle. He looked at Gaara who was struggling just as much to slurp up all the noodles and realized that Gaara probably hated this dish more than Naruto did. He had never seen the Kazekage eat ramen before and wasn't sure if he even liked the dish. But both boys persevered, shooting anxious, forced smiles at one another as they complimented the quality of the food.

Naruto took a bite of pork and chewed it thoughtfully. It wasn't the usual color of pork and he seemed to notice something was off. "This is unusual pork," Naruto commented. "Where is it from?"

Gaara took a bite of his own as if to test Uzumaki's statement. "It's goat," he stated matter-of-factly before finishing the piece. Naruto choked on his food at the response. Kakashi, failing to hide his mirth, pat him on the back and pushed his glass of water closer.

"… Oh. It's… tasty." He forced another piece into his mouth and chewed it vigorously. Gaara paused, put down his chopsticks and stared at Naruto carefully. Kakashi could see that he was considering something and had not yet reached a conclusion.

"You don't like it." Gaara reached to take the bowl from him, but Naruto protested and dragged it closer to him. Gaara was not convinced. He grabbed the bowl and began to pull it away, but Naruto overdid it and when he yanked on the bowl once more the rest of the contents went flying. The noodles landed on Naruto and what soup didn't seep into his clothes had no problem wetting Kakashi's.

Everyone was silent.

The owner of the stand noticed the mishap and offered them a towel to clean up. Kakashi was interested to see that Gaara looked slightly upset. The kazekage was rumored to be anything, but sensitive. He said nothing, but rose from his stool and thanked the owner for the meal. Placing a few bills on the counter and leaving his unfinished bowl of ramen, Gaara quickly began walking away.

Kakashi was slightly confused about what he was expected to do. He knew he was obligated to follow, but he had had the feeling that the Kazekage wanted to be alone right now. He seemed upset, more than Kakashi thought he should be for what was technically Naruto's blunder. But he didn't make it far before Naruto cursed under his breath, hopped up and, quickly swiping off most of the noodles, ran the few yards to the Kazekage.

"Gaara wait! It wasn't your fault." He turned the Kazekage to face him, hands firmly on his shoulders, but Gaara refused to meet his eyes. He stared at the floor and Kakashi was amazed to see how young he really looked. "I'm sorry, okay? You meant well and I botched it up." Naruto's tone was firm, but gentle- _conciliatory_. The Kazekage continued to stare at the floor. Kakashi stayed where he was, incredibly amused. If the idea wasn't so preposterous, he'd swear they were having a lover's spat. Naruto's tone remained gentle, consoling as he whispered things that were too low to hear clearly. He raised his hand and pulled the Kazekage's chin up. Anyone other than Naruto would have been charged with insubordination, but the Kazekage only raised green eyes to him slowly, still upset but seeming to relax a bit more at Naruto's words.

The owner of the ramen stand was interested in what was going on as well, but he hid behind his attempt to clean up the mess the two boys had left. Kakashi continued to stare as Naruto coaxed a smile out of Gaara. It was at that moment that Kakashi realized that his idea wasn't as preposterous as he'd first imagined. The image of the two boys smiling at one another- the way Naruto smiled at Gaara was enough to understand exactly why Naruto treated Gaara so differently.

Kakashi, bemused, chuckled to himself. He only hoped they'd be more discreet about their public displays, but who was he to complain? If anything, he was grateful; for Naruto just gave him the perfect excuse for why, next time, he shouldn't join them for ramen…

--


	3. Power of a Kazekage, PG, Angst

The Power of a Kazekage

--

The Power of a Kazekage

--

The first thing he noticed was the blood. His own ran cold while the sand rattled in his gourd, excited by the sheen of red that seemed to be everywhere. A once golden body, now pale, lay amidst the pool of red, eyes closed peacefully like an angel misplaced.

Gaara ran to him, his heart caught in his throat and his heart hammering with fear, but then hands were holding him back, restraining him against his will.

"He needs medical attention! Let the doctor work! There's nothing you can do for him!"

He wanted to scream, to kick, to rage. He wanted blood- not that of his now unconscious lover, but of the men who had done this to him.

But the hands held on tightly while all he could do was watch- watch while the medic nin went to work to try to save the man he loved, and pray.

--

He sat in the hospital for hours. Tsunade was understanding, offering a room in the Hokage Tower should he need some rest, but his advisors and councilors were less forgiving.

Kankuro, who he discovered had been the one to hold him back, stayed close by, sending away any councilors trying to seek a word with either kage. Tsunade had her hands full as it was. When she caught word of the attack and Naruto's injury, she bulldozed her way into the hospital room and had been pouring all her energies into saving him for some hours now.

Gaara felt like it would never end. And then, just as suddenly, Tsunade stepped out of the emergency room and announced that she had done all she could. Now all they could do was wait.

Gaara released Kankuro from duty. There was no use in making everyone stay up and exhaust themselves waiting. And when his brother refused, he made it an order, asking Tsunade to have him escorted to the Hokage Tower.

Gaara was allowed to wait inside the room and Gaara nearly wept to see his friend, his comrade, his love laying so quietly on the hospital bed. The tall, proud shinobi looked so vulnerable sleeping with all those tubes and machines hooked up to him.

He didn't get to dwell on it very long before a knock sounded at the door. A councilor was asking for him and when Gaara exited the corridor to see what he needed, he found a large hat being thrust towards him. The blue diamond stood out harshly in the white light and the black "wind" character reminded him oddly of Naruto's blue eyes and the great power of his elemental chakra.

"Kazekage-sama, you dropped this earlier. Please be more careful in the future. You are our leader."

Gaara felt the anger in him rising. As if he needed to be reminded. How silly to worry about a stupid hat.

"Also, the other councilors were wondering when we shall report back home. This delay wasn't in the itinerary. It isn't wise to stay away from the village for too long. Nor is it wise to get involved in any of Konoha's skirmishes…" The councilor looked at the floor. Gaara understood the message perfectly.

He knew he was the Kazekage and that he had duties and responsibilities. He knew it because he had decided that he had wanted it and he worked hard to get it. Now, the one man who truly understood him, that loved him and had taught him the beauty of being the kage was laying in a hospital half dead. And for all the power and authority that stupid hat signified, none of it was useful now. All that power and none that could save the one he loved.

He felt his blood burn through his veins, he rage once again surging through him. He snatched the hat away and threw it against the wall. The councilor looked at the discarded hat with alarm before turning back to Gaara warily.

"It is because of that man now unconscious that I am alive and the active Kazekage today. We do not leave until I am sure he is safe and that there is nothing more we can do to help him. Is that understood?"

The councilor gulped and nodded, backing away slowly before he retreated.

Gaara watched as he left, still angry and unable to lash out. He looked at the hat sitting on the hospital floor and had the urge to rip it up to shreds. All that power, prestige, _everything_ meant nothing now. He had done it all to make Naruto proud. Without him, it was just a hat.

Clenching his teeth together he punched the hospital wall, but his own sand blocked him before his fist could connect.

Frustrated, he sank into the chair at Naruto's bedside and held his hand in his own. The tears came freely now for all he could do was sit by him, and wait.

He cried his fear, his frustrations and his genuine heartache. He clung to Naruto's hand whispering promises of all the things he would do if the blond would just open his eyes. He had promised to eat ramen again when a voice interrupted him.

"Can I get that in writing?" Naruto's voice was feeble, but there was a hint of his usual playfulness behind it. Gaara froze, noting that Naruto's eyes were slightly open and then cried more; this time out of joy. He nodded and laughed in agreement before asking if there was anything else he wanted.

Naruto smiled slightly, squeezing Gaara's hand weakly.

"Gaara," he started slowly, "I'm glad you're here." He closed his eyes again, scaring Gaara before he opened them again. "Stay with me?"

Gaara held his hand to his lips and nodded.

_That_ he could do.

--


	4. Chasing Dreams, PG, fluff

Chasing Dreams

--

Chasing Dreams

--

Temari stared down at the object in her hands. The wide brimmed hat spanned out like a white umbrella. She imagined it would be heavier, more solid, but perhaps that was the psychological burden that went with it.

"Are you sure about this?" She looked into her brother's clear green eyes. Few would meet his gaze even now, but she had grown accustomed to it in the years. He gave her a firm nod, eyes unblinking and mouth stiff with determination. "But you've worked so hard! Think about everything you've accomplished!" She placed the hat on top of the Kazekage desk. "What about your dreams?"

"I've already accomplished all I can here," he replied calmly. He sounded confident and she knew then that he had not taken the decision lightly. She frowned slightly, shaking her head in disagreement. A million thoughts and possible streams of argument played themselves out as she debated on which one to choose. "It's time to follow other dreams."

She looked into his eyes again, not afraid of showing him her doubts, of letting him know just how strongly she wanted him to stay.

"But we love you here. You can _still_ be Kazekage."

This time it was he shaking his head, eyes never leaving hers. "Shukaku is gone. My powers are not what they once were."

"You're still strong enough!" She balled up her fists.

He held up his hand, imploring her to stop and listen. "I am." He paused and considered his wording. "I could be,… if I worked hard for it."

She felt a sliver of hope, her face lighting up with a smile. "We can train together! All of us, with Kankuro! You've always been stronger in defense and I…" her words petered out as he shook his head.

"I have already decided. I will leave Suna." He spoke with the authority of the Kazekage: the tone that brooked no arguments, except where she and Kankuro were concerned.

"I don't understand! Why? Why must you leave the place that loves you!? The place you worked so hard to make love you…"

Gaara smiled. "Because I've learned what love is- the love of a village for its leader, that of one family member for another," he placed a hand on her shoulder, "and it's all that I had hoped for."

"Then why are you leaving?" She let her exasperation creep into her voice. "You're the strongest one. We need you."

He was quiet, turning away to pick up the Kazekage hat. He turned it in his hands, contemplating. "Not anymore. And so I'm entrusting this with you." He held the hat out to her once more. An offering. If she accepted, she feared that he would walk out the door and never return. And she was afraid that she would fail where he had succeeded.

"I can't do this without you."

He chuckled and even now it was strange to hear. "You won't have to." He smiled at her with affection. "I will return. As Suna's ambassador to Konoha I'll be living there, but I am allowed to return."

She still hadn't accepted the hat. She looked down at it with all the doubts of an older sister who couldn't bear to see her baby brother go. "You still haven't told me why you're not fighting for this. What dream could you possibly chase in Konoha that you can't achieve here?"

Gaara took in a deep breath. His eyelids lowered, looking at the symbol in his hands. Raising a hand to his forehead, he tapped the symbol staining his pale forehead. Temari wrinkled her forehead in confusion. "Someone taught me that this symbol meant following your heart. And now it's bringing me back to him." Temari turned his words over, but still could not comprehend.

"You want to train with Uzumaki?" She felt a little hurt that Gaara didn't think she and Kankuro good enough.

And for the first time, Temari heard her brother erupt into pure laughter.

"I'd welcome the opportunity, but no. I want to love him. And maybe someday, earn his love in return." Temari's cheeks turned pink. She had never seen Gaara show interest in any of the young kunoichi obviously infatuated with her brother, but now she was beginning to understand why.

"But what if…?"

"If he loves someone else? If he doesn't prefer men? If he can't accept me as more than a friend?" He lowered the hat. "I've asked myself all these questions already. It's not a decision I take lightly. But as I said, I've accomplished all that I can in Suna, earned the love of all those I deem important. Except for one."

"Time to chase new dreams," she chuckled, a slight sense of wonder that her brother would be so bold to follow someone he loved, indeed, to have learned to be able to love. The warmth of pride filled her heart and before she knew it, she had drawn him into a strong embrace. "I can't argue with that." She squeezed him though she knew he hated it. "But I'm going to miss you."

Gaara pried himself away and she let him go. Fixing his robes he smiled in amusement to himself. "I think you'll be too busy."

Temari smiled, remembering how much Gaara hated the paperwork the first few months. "I think I can handle a few documents." Gaara continued to smile as if some private joke.

"The new ambassador from Konoha will arrive shortly after my departure. I hear he is a brilliant shinobi, the same year as Uzumaki. He was highly recommended by the Hokage." Temari couldn't be sure, but it sounded like her brother was being coy.

"You think he may cause problems?"

"Well, you two have worked together numerous times so I'm sure everything will progress smoothly." He picked up the hat again and placed it on her head. "Just don't let Nara distract you too much." Temari blushed and before she could say a word of protest, she was being ushered outside the Kazekage office, into an audience of applauding officials.

--


	5. Syrupy Surprise, M, Humor

--

Syrupy Surprise

--

Kankuro opens the fridge. He grabs the glass jar of goat milk and pulls it out, holding it in one hand as he searches the fridge for the other object on his " to find" list. He checks the usual spot, but it is not there. There is only negative space in the otherwise crowded shelf.

Puzzled, he searches the other shelves, shifts through the bottles and bagged vegetables his sister has no doubt placed there. He even searches behind the cheese, but there is no bottle, only a forgotten tomato that has shriveled in its exile.

Kankuro huffs. He slams the fridge with more force than necessary and thumps the glass bottle onto the table. He pulls out a tumbler, sets it down and fills it up. He takes one sip, grimaces and sets it back down.

"Teeeemari!" he rushes into the living room where his sister is sitting down clipping her toenails. Her face is scrunched up in more concentration than such a menial task requires. "Did you use the last of my chocolate syrup? You now I HATE regular milk."

She doesn't look up, only scratches at something with her finger before clipping the next nail. "I wouldn't touch it with a ten foot pole. I know how uppity you get about your damn chocolate milk." Kankuro frowns from the doorway, but she can't see it. "Have you asked Gaara?" She clips another toe nail.

"I hope you're picking those up. Last time one of them nearly stabbed me when I sat down." He cringes thinking of how he over reacted. He had thought someone was trying to booby trap the couch. "And Gaara hates chocolate. Why would he touch it?" Kankuro crossed his arms, leaning against the doorway.

Temari finally looks up at him, her opinion of his intelligence, or lack of, clearly visible in her expression. "Because Uzumaki came over today and he's less fond of goat milk than you are. Maybe Gaara borrowed your stupid syrup for his sake."

"Oh," Kankuro smiles somewhat sheepishly. He had forgotten that his brother's friend was visiting from Konoha. Remembering the blond's loud declamations over how foul he thought it last time, this was a likely possibility. Thanking his sister cursorily, he walks briskly to his brother's room.

His brother had been quiet this morning, which is perhaps why Kankuro failed to notice that they had a guest. In fact, they had both been quiet. He wonders if they are still here or if they chose to enjoy the town as Uzumaki so seldom has a chance to do. Or perhaps his brother is showing the Kage wannabe his office where Uzumaki is no doubt wearing his brother's official hat and sitting in his chair.

Kankuro reaches the door and not believing either of them actually present he knocks as a courtesy and opens the door.

He just as abruptly stops in his tracks. He is frozen for what is most likely five seconds, but feels much longer until his brain kicks in and he regains control of himself. He swiftly shuts the door and shielding his eyes as though it can block him from seeing his memories, he motors his way back to the kitchen.

Kankuro is troubled the entire short journey back to the refrigerator. His brother is not a messy person, but there was clothing strewn across the floor, his chocolate syrup knocked over, dripping onto the bed and Gaara himself the portrait of guilt caught red handed- dark sticky smudges streaking his nose and pale cheeks.

"Did Gaara know where it was?" Temari yells from the other room.

"Yeah," Kankuro replies. He looks at his milk once more, steeling himself for another sip of plain milk. He takes a deep breath and stares down the unarmed tumbler.

"Did he use it for Uzumaki like I guessed?"

"You can say that." He ignores Temari's snort of triumph, half tempted to send her to see for herself. Instead he concentrates on the glass, picks it up in hurriedly and takes another sip before he can convince himself otherwise. He forces it down with an exaggerated gulp before sticking out his tongue and giving out a general sound of disgust. But the milk has served its purpose. He feels a little more at ease.

Kankuro picks up the bottle of milk he left out on the table. He turns to open the fridge, still reflecting on his awe at discovering his brother doesn't hate chocolate as much as he claims. But unfortunate for him, thanks to today Kankuro resolves never to buy chocolate syrup again. He places the bottle back on the shelf, rummages between some containers and pulls out Temari's strawberry syrup instead.

--


	6. Playtime, PG, Humor

Title: Playtime

--

Playtime

--

"Uncle Gaara, uncle Gaara!" a little girl smiled at him. Even with the gaps between her teeth the lopsided grin reminded him of his sister- reminded him of trouble. "Look what I found!" she held up an old, faded teddy bear. "Isn't she cute?" Gaara's body tensed at the sight of the delicate object being clutched so tightly in grubby hands. His immediate response would have been to snatch it straight out of her hands, but she was a child, and he was supposed to be the adult here.

His fingers itched when she swung it around in the air, eyes glued to the thin connection between the stubby arms and the rest of the worn body. He thought about stealthily taking it away with the aid of his sand, but the look of delight on his niece's face told him that she would most definitely notice.

She stopped twirling and looked the bear square in the face. "We'll be best friends," she murmured before hugging it tight. And then he knew he couldn't possibly try to steal it from her now. He would be a villain, a bully if he even attempted it. He watched with anxiety wondering in the back of his mind if she would try to go home with it.

The sound of pattering footsteps echoed in the room. A small boy tottering on chubby legs rushed forward to look at his sister's discovery. "Nee-tan, nee-tan, me too!" He held his arms out, reaching for the bear still clutched in his sister's arms.

"I found him first!" she said defensively, pushing the little one away while the other hand swung the bear high in the air. Gaara wanted to snatch it before the arm tore and gave way, but now his nephew was pouting, the watery eyes promising tears if something wasn't done soon. Gaara stood, fixed in his indecision- his nephew or the bear?

But suddenly the bear was being taken away. The two children looked up in surprise at the leaf shinobi who held the bear gently in his hands.

"I'm sorry Mari, but this is your uncle's very special friend. I think uncle Gaara will feel very lonely if you try to steal him away." Naruto looked at Gaara, laugher twinkling in his blue eyes. "Am I wrong?" He held his hands out, offering the worn stuffed animal.

Gaara smiled in relief. He accepted the bear and held it gently.

"I'm sorry Mari, Mi-kun, but this is my oldest and dearest friend." Their eyes widened in surprise- Mi-kun's still longing but Mari's wide and apologetic. Gaara ruffled her blond hair affectionately. "I'm sorry I don't have many toys for you to play with, but I bet if you look in uncle Kankuro's room you'll find lots to play with," Gaara smirked.

Mari's eyes sparkled with renewed excitement. "Let's go Mi-kun!" She grabbed her brother's hand and they were off. Squeals of delight echoed down the hallway.

Naruto chuckled beside him. "That was evil."

Gaara nodded and smiled to himself quietly. "That's what he gets for making me babysit alone."

Naruto raised an eyebrow at him, his fingers just brushing Gaara's hand. "Not alone," he reminded him.

A loud crash sounded from Kankuro's bedroom followed by a series of childish giggles. Naruto looked in their direction in alarm, but Gaara wasn't concerned. He took Naruto's hand into his own and squeezed his palm.

"No, not alone." He looked down at the brown bear still cuddled in one arm and smiled.

--


	7. Wait For Me, PG13, Angst

--

--

_This time is difficult. Wait for me._

_We will live it out vividly._

_Give me your small hand:_

_we will rise and suffer, _

_we will feel, we will rejoice._

Pablo Neruda

--

Kakashi is not usually a fan of rain, but today it is a consolation. Even without a parka to shield him or an umbrella to keep him safe, he enjoys the assault of fat raindrops or the startling impact of small splashes against his eyelash. It is the only way to distract him from the anxiety radiating from the shinobi in front of him; from the potentially sad situation that they run to and the not so consoling welcome awaiting their return.

The feeling of hopelessness is too easy to succumb to. But he is the teacher, the sempai, the one who others turn to for guidance. So he does not admit that this time it is Naruto's strength, not his own, holding their team together. Naruto is tearing through the forest at a speed that is considered reckless. His chakra will no doubt be near depleted by the time they reach Suna. But this is a race and not one that Naruto is willing to lose a second time. Kakashi cannot blame him.

Kakashi would sigh but he cannot spare the breath for such a small gesture. Today he feels a weariness he has not experienced for some time. Today he feels tired from all the races. The race to stop Madara from regaining power, the race to save himself from permanent blindness in hopes of saving Sasuke as well; the race to avenge their newly departed Hokage, and now the race to save the Kazekage before they are robbed of him too.

There is no time for grieving. Only now, only these so many races to save what's left to be saved.

He is distracted again when he notices that the rain is easing up. He feels no more harsh splashes, only mild sprinkles. The smell of earth reaches him even amidst the trees. He is relieved the assaulting hand of nature has turned into a caress; and though he cannot appreciate the stillness no doubt pervading the blurred images around him, he likes to imagine. This stillness is much more comforting than death or the calmness shinobi so often have forced upon them.

The elders were calm when they informed him Tsunade once mentioned him as a potential successor; he, the only surviving protégé of the legendary fourth. He will not tell Naruto of course, but his declining sight in one eye concerns him. And with the same unnerving calmness that should not follow a loved one's death, he thanked the elders for honoring him with a nomination, but informed them that it belongs to the fourth's son.

Kakashi has said nothing about letting Naruto set the pace and Sakura has not complained. He wonders if Naruto himself has noticed his position as leader this time. He does not know he will be leader from now on, taking Tsunade's place upon his return.

Kakashi hopes it lifts his spirits and renews the energy he has been pouring into breaking Sasuke's silence. Even with one eye closed Kakashi can see how Naruto loves his teammate, each of them. But these days Sasuke shows more kindness to Sakura and Kakashi fears that this is his latest form of competition. It bothers him how Naruto looks a little more defeated every day.

Kakashi feels the beginnings of soreness in his legs. Naruto's endurance surpassed his years ago and they have been traveling at top speed since morning. He believes Naruto will forego eating and sleeping if it means saving Gaara. Kakashi resolves to follow for as long as he can without complaint. He believes Naruto needs this break. He needs this mission and its success. Because more than stopping Madara, Naruto needs Gaara.

When the relationship started Kakashi will never know, but what was once two boys identifying and acknowledging shared pain became a deeper acknowledgement and understanding of one another. His puppy love for Sakura aside, Kakashi believes it is Sasuke Naruto truly craves. And where Sasuke is unwilling to take risks, the Kazekage is not.

Someday Naruto will win over Sakura, or he will find a pretty girl who will love him and bear his children. They will be loved and trained and no doubt infused with that indomitable Uzumaki spirit. But for now, Naruto teaches himself how to love through friendship, rivalry and the not so secret trysts afforded him when he and Gaara are together.

Kakashi smiles beneath his mask. Naruto believes he is skilled in the art of stealth. And should the mission prove successful, he will be allowed to maintain the false illusion. Kakashi tries not to laugh as he imagines it. Naruto will attempt to sneak into the Kazekage's bed chamber and will be allowed to do so because Kankuro will inform the guards to keep their distance as he always has.

Kakashi smiles despite how tired he is beginning to feel. He will push forward another hour or two before he absolutely must rest. He will persist because he needs this mission to be a success. Life will not be so simple once they return and his Hokage, no, Naruto needs this respite- the one real consolation that only Gaara can provide him. Kakashi has always been a loyal servant and does anything he can to serve his Hokage, but today, before all that, he will push himself to breaking. He will do anything within his power to preserve Naruto's innocent love- his last scrap of naiveté. It is will be his last act before everything becomes topsy turvy; his last gift as a teacher to his student.

--


	8. It Doesnt Matter, PG, Angst

It Doesn't Matter

It Doesn't Matter

Sasuke closed his eyes. He could feel those blue eyes watching him from the corner of the kazekage's office, silently asking that question repeatedly:

_Why?_

He opened his eyes and stared out through the limited vision afforded by an ANBU mask. He kept his alert up, or tried to as he scanned the perimeter just outside the east side of the tower.

He tried to focus on the pedestrians down below or the consistent crinkling of paper behind him.

_Why did you do it?_

Those blue eyes came back to him, narrowed in defiance above the flash of teeth, clenched in anger. It was the first time Naruto nearly landed a hit with a kunai.

Sasuke pushed the memories away, unwilling to think about the question- unwilling to face the answer.

"I am missing a scroll," the Kazekage's voice disrupted the silence. Sasuke turned to face him, but the Kazekage wasn't addressing him. Naruto's blue eyes were alert; Sasuke could imagine his confused expression behind the ANBU kitsune mask.

"Can you specify which one?" Sasuke asked.

The Kazekage turned to face him. Those green eyes still had no expression. "The fourth in the proposed treaty amendments," he said.

"I'll retrieve them. Please wait here, Kazekage-sama." Gaara nodded his head in acknowledgement. Sasuke knew then that the Kazekage recognized him. He had become quite adept at detecting dislike.

He bowed curtly and exited the room, but not before catching Naruto's blue eyes watching him from behind that mask.

_Why did you let me live?_

Tears had been streaming from those eyes.

Sasuke's steps made no sound. He was at the Hokage's door before he could erase the image from his mind. "Hokage-sama," he bowed to the figure sitting serenely at her desk.

"Uchiha," she acknowledged him. "What takes you away from your duty?" She flipped through another paper, readying her stamp.

"The Kazekage is missing a scroll. He requested the fourth scroll in the series of treaty amendments."

"Ah yes," she replied, placing her stamp on a document carefully. "_That_ one," she smiled and pressed down firmly. "Right side, middle drawer," she looked up at him finally. "Is that all?" she smiled.

"Yes, Hokage-sama," Sasuke bowed. "Shitsurei shimashita."

Sasuke thought of her smile on the way back. She smiled as though she understood a joke that he did not. As though she had seen right through him and laughed. He felt frustrated with himself then- with Naruto and the unanswered question that was plaguing him.

Lost in his thoughts, he failed to knock on the door before entering. And then the whole world stopped.

Naruto straightened himself out quickly, posture so straight, Iruka would have been proud.

"The scroll is in the middle drawer on the right side."

Sasuke resumed his position in the corner.

The Kazekage gave no thanks or recognition. He merely opened the specified drawer and rummaged inside.

Sasuke kept his back to the Kazekage. The image of Naruto casually touching the other man was emblazoned in his mind. Sasuke didn't know much about the present Kazekage. They had encountered one another very little since the Chuunin exams, but he was unfamiliar with this composed individual; the one who didn't lose his temper or react violently to Sasuke's impertinence, the one who didn't note Naruto's careless touch as though he were accustomed to it- as though it were the most natural thing in the world.

For once he wished he _had_ kept the Sharingan activated if only to see what expression Naruto hid behind that mask.

Sasuke stared out the window silently brooding. The image of Naruto's careless hand on the Kazekage's shoulder kept flashing through his mind, the image mocking him until he imagined the Kazekage facing him and it became the Hokage smiling at him once more knowingly.

His attention snapped back to the present. He hazarded a cautious peek at the dutiful Kazekage, but found no grin- only a head of red curls quietly bent over the desk, green eyes scrutinizing the document in his pale hands.

Sasuke tried to calm his erratically beating heart.

Had the smile been there or had he only imagined it?

_Why should it matter?_ He imagined Naruto asking him. He imagined Naruto touching the other man purposefully, waiting for Sasuke to find them, if only to remind him of…

Sasuke cut off that train of thought.

_Why does it bother you?_ That voice whispered to him- the ghostly memory of a hand caressed him. He resisted the urge to bat away at it physically, the way he had the first time.

It shouldn't matter. It _didn't._ Sasuke had decided long ago that it didn't.

It didn't matter whether Naruto had lived or died, or that he had let him live. It didn't matter that he had stared at the quiet slumbering face for minutes afterwards- stared and watched the rain slide along those parted lips. It didn't matter that Naruto had offered him a bond; the bond of rivalry, friendship, or the chance to step into the forbidden beyond. Because Sasuke had decided he wouldn't be trapped by those again or give the chance for anyone to hold power over him in any matter related to the heart.

_Because I want him..._

The answer to every question filled him faster than he could breathe.

And the coveted smiles and the caresses that came with being wanted in return. A dull throb in his chest spread like a slow burn, rolling upwards until it reached his throat. He wondered if this was what anxiety felt like.

It was too dangerous, required too much risk and Itachi had taught him only too well that even those most dear to you could be the greatest of enemies. Uchiha Sasuke would give no enemy an opening. He was not one to make himself vulnerable.

But apparently Gaara was.

A dull pain pulsated from deep within him. He pondered if this was jealousy, frustration, or possibly grief. And still, he felt an overwhelming sense of relief. Sasuke had found an answer to his question.

His mind flashed back to the image of those two smiling at each other, face unflinching though he wanted to look away. A small part of him grieved that he had lost his chance to love a man who had once offered his hand to him- who had now moved on. And yet somehow it didn't equate to the relief of knowing that it didn't matter, anymore.


	9. Slipping, PG, Angst

Slipping

Sand rattles uneasily, pitter-pattering against the drum-like surface of his gourd. The noise crescendoes and falls with Gaara's tireless pacing across his floor.

_It was just a kiss._ Naruto's cold words haunt him. _I didn't mean anything by it. _Those cold eyes will not leave.

Gaara feels like he is choking on the burning sensation in his throat. He clenches his teeth and squeezes his eyes shut, willing himself to unfurl the fingers tightly balled in fists at his side. He takes a deep breath and reminds himself to stay calm, not to lose control. The sand settles in the gourd before it begins to slowly stir again. Gaara paces once more across his room.

He pauses when he catches himself in the mirror. His mask has slipped in places, his skin showing through the cracks like the face of a broken porcelain doll. He tightens the shield, shutting himself in, wishing everything could mend this easily; wishing sand could block out the pain or the longing he glimpsed beneath the cracks.

His back straightens sharply with the knock at his door.

"Kazekage-sama," his guard's voice is muffled, "Uzumaki Naruto is here to see you."

Gaara braces himself with a slow breath. "Send him in," he says.

He is still standing when the shinobi enters, his chakra a heat signature by the door.

"We'll be leaving soon," he says cautiously. Gaara turns and notes his hands twisting themselves nervously. He takes a step forward and the sand rattles anxiously. Blue eyes dart, startled by the ominous sound. Gaara's gaze catches movement--the lick of dry lips and the bob of an Adam's apple. Naruto is pressing himself against the door and shrinking back with every step that Gaara takes.

"Look, I'm sorry!" he panics. "I'm sorry about yesterday!"

Gaara presses one hand against the wooden door. He stands close enough to feel Naruto's warmth through his clothes, to feel the humidity of air exhaled from between his parted lips. Gaara meets his eyes and the sand slips and hovers in the air like a small storm frozen between them. He leans forward, mouth close enough to just brush the soft skin. He presses their mouths together slowly, closing his eyes and squeezing out the longing. He tries to pour it into his kiss like it is something physical, tangible, capable of manipulation like something he can control.

He tries to will it back to the one who caused it.

The leaf shinobi is quiet as he pulls away. He exhales something akin to relief.

"Good-bye," Gaara says and steps back. The longing still burns like a coal inside him. The sand shifts and the porcelain mask slips back in place.

"Gaara, I'm..."

"Sorry," he cuts him off. The mask hides the bitter-sweetness in his smile. "I will not allow this mask to slip a second time. Consider this. . . the end of it."

Naruto's face twists in pain. He steps forward and Gaara flinches when two broad palms press against his face.

"Let it go," he says. His hands are gentle despite the clumsy fingers stroking his cheek, peeling away the mask in small increments. "I'll let mine go if you do."

His lips are warm, his hands gentle despite the clumsy way they stroke the sand now slipping like so many unspoken words between them.


	10. Waking, T, erotic dream

This was written for a kink meme on LJ. Short, but it gets the point across, I hope. :)

-

Waking

--

He insisted that he wasn't tired, that he didn't need to rest. There were too many things to attend to, funeral arrangements to be made. The doctor told him there was nothing to worry about save a few toes that might not regain feeling or nerve endings that might not feel the same. But Temari's hands were pressing him into the mattress, Kankuro's puppets loomed over him to make sure he stayed. Baki glared at him from above the pillow along with Matsuri, his advisors and the old woman who made his tea. They stood like mountains towering over him, ready to descend at the first protest. And Gaara agreed that he would heed their advice and suddenly they were gone.

He sat up, suddenly alone, but a voice warned him not to go. A hint of a smile, of secret laughter lingered beneath the stern words. When he tried to rise, two warm hands grasped him, wrestled him down into the sheets. He should have been surprised but he felt none as he turned to regard bright blue eyes smiling at him, a fox-like grin on a tan face. "I won't let you go," he said, wrapping one leg around Gaara's, pinning him in place.

Gaara felt impatient and pushed against the heavy limbs. He tried to summon his sand or the shield wrapped around his skin, but this too had forsaken him. The other boy grinned as he turned Gaara in the bed, pinned the kazekage's hips with two strong legs on either side.

"I won't let you go," he repeated.

Gaara shoved and his legs kicked, but his opponent was heavy, his legs gripped his tightly. Gaara struggled against his helplessness even as he felt his wrists pinned above his head. Their hips pressed so tight, they pinned him down, kept him warm. He should have been angry at his friend's betrayal. He should have raged at being treated so barbarically. But that devious grin never faltered, and those blue eyes never lost the glittery edge of mischief lurking in the shadows between them. When Gaara struggled again, he gasped to discover his skin was bare. Their bodies pressed together, the shock of flesh upon flesh sending a pang through Gaara's belly. When he struggled it was an upward shift of his hips, a kick to get his legs out from under. He hooked his ankles around two straining calves, gripped them tight and raised his hips.

Those blue eyes never left his. They watched him now, tongue wetting his lips as he thrust against Gaara roughly. There was no mystery behind the hardness pressed against his belly; no question about how or why they had gotten here. Only the wet sounds of other's mouth and tongue Gaara's neck, his chest, the sensitive flesh around his nipples. There was no pain, only the heat of flesh entering him, only the pleasure humming around his bones.

Gaara shuddered and when he opened his eyes he was alone, in his bedroom. A dim light filtered through the bedroom window that he recognized as the early light of dawn as it seeped across the city walls. His fingers crept between his legs tentatively. He shuddered again and snatched his hand away.

So this was a dream, he thought.

He exhaled into the silent room, closed his eyes and found Uzumaki's expression waiting for him there. Later he would ask Kankuro what it means. Later he would ask if it was always so messy or if waking up would always make him feel alone.


End file.
